


You Are My Path to Peace

by BookewyrmeWritesFic



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Dancer Victor, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, Not between Victuuri, Past Abuse, crossover episode, dancer yuuri, recovery from abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:01:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 15,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22120720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookewyrmeWritesFic/pseuds/BookewyrmeWritesFic
Summary: When Victor’s boyfriend is at his worst, Victor turns to his childhood best friend for support every time. Yuuri does his best to navigate his long-standing crush on Victor and being a supportive friend, but there are a few bumps along the way. At least at the end of the day, they still get time to dance together.
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov
Comments: 127
Kudos: 197





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, we’re going to try posting this story again. I’m going to post twice a week until it’s done. If you’re just finding this fic for the first time, please enjoy. If you’re back from the first time I posted this story, then welcome back and I hope you enjoy your second round reading!
> 
> This story is incredibly important to me as it draws on and is informed by real life experiences of myself and my friends with abusive relationships. I do want to warn everyone that there will be a lot of discussion of mentally and emotionally abusive incidents, though due to the viewpoint I mostly won't be showing them. There will also be the usual depression and anxiety things that come with YOI, as well as a fair share of pining. But! I promise fluff and happiness at the end!
> 
> Finally, I just want to mention that there are resources out there for you if you find yourself or a loved one in a similar situation to Victor. There are fewer resources for men unfortunately, so I won't really be showing them much in this story. But please, please speak to your local DV shelter or consider calling the DV Hotline line (800) 799-7233. They are wonderful people who will do everything they can to assist you in escaping the situation as safely as possible and in your own time. You are not alone, and you don't deserve whatever may have happened to you. Be safe Darlings.

A small sigh puffed between Yuuri’s lips as he stepped off the elevator to his condo and saw the lone figure huddled outside his door. Victor pushed his long silver hair out of his face and cast Yuuri a watery smile as he stopped in front of him.

“Hey. C-can I stay here for a while? K-Kevin, um, kicked me out again.”

Yuuri’s heart sank, but he pasted on a soft smile. “Of course, Vitya. You know you’re always welcome. Come on, let’s go inside.”

Victor followed him inside, shoulders hunched as if expecting a blow. Yuuri sighed again internally and gestured his guest toward the couch. “So, what did he do this time?”

“N-no no it’s all my fault” Victor stuttered, hands waving in frantic denial. “I shouldn’t have made him mad. Really, I fucked up. I tried to make dinner and I ended up just making a mess instead. I’m so useless, it’s no surprise he doesn’t want anything to do with me. And I shouldn’t have talked back, I know I shouldn’t I-I j-just-” Abruptly, tears were drowning the soft blue of Victor’s eyes. 

Not for the first time, Yuuri gathered Victor into his arms and let him cry on his shoulder. The wrenching sobs tore at his heart, as did the muffled litany of I just want it to stop hurting.

~  
It was with great reluctance that Yuuri sent Victor back to the apartment he shared with Kevin near the cafe where Victor worked part time. Yuuri had offered to let Victor stay in the condo while he and Phichit were at work, but Victor insisted he had to get home before Kevin started to look for him and got mad. Yuuri’s stomach twisted at this, but he acquiesced and went to the University in a gloomy mood. Midway through the afternoon, he texted Victor, just to check in. It took slightly longer than he liked for Victor to respond, but hopefully it was just because he was at work.

_2:55pm  
Hey you, how’s it going?_

_3:30pm  
ok i guess_

_3:32pm  
Work?_

_3:35pm  
Yea. Kevin wanted me to call in and stay home with him but I knew my boss would kill me if I called in today._

_3:40pm  
Yea, probably not a good idea to call in unless you really need it._

_3:42pm  
yea, guess i’ll just have to make it up to kev another way ;)_

Yuuri groaned as he headed off to his afternoon class. These things went in cycles,so Victor would probably be ok for another week, especially if he was apologetic enough. 

~  
Victor and Kevin were at Cultured Coffee when Yuuri walked in after work the next day. They were snuggled down on one of the overstuffed loveseats like a pair of turtle-doves. They noticed Yuuri when he walked in, though, and Victor waved him over enthusiastically. With a nod of acknowledgment, Yuuri stepped up to the counter to get his latte and then wandered over to a squashy easy-chair beside their nest. 

“Hi Victor, Kevin.”

“Katsuki.” Kevin acknowledged him shortly.

Victor bounced happily and leaned toward Yuuri. “Yura, listen, guess what? Kevin is taking me out, if I’m very good!”

“Ah,” Yuuri struggled for a moment. “Um, so I guess you guys worked everything out then?”

Victor flapped his hands dismissively but Yuuri was caught momentarily by the flash of something dark on Kevin’s face. Victor appeared not to notice and burbled on.

“Yes all better, and guess where he’s taking me! He said he’d take me to the ballet! I’m so excited, you know I love dance of all kinds, and I haven’t gotten to do much with it since college!” Victor pressed a playful hand to Kevin’s chest. “This guy just insists I don’t get too technical on him or anything. So I’ll be on my very best behavior of course. Oh! But Yuuri, you should come with us! It’d be so fun, like college days again!”

“Ahm...you wouldn’t rather...have it just the two of you? I’d hate to intrude on your date.”

Victor’s laugh was bright and charming. “No no, it’s not a date. That’s not what Kevy likes to do on dates.” 

An extravagantly saucy wink made Yuuri flush a bit at the implications. He and Victor had known each other for years, throughout high school and college. They had been best friends and confidants from their first meeting, two expat kids finding common ground in a suburban American school together. They had even majored in dance together, though Yuuri continued studying beyond Victor. Yuuri had harbored a secret crush on Victor through high school and undergrad, but he liked to think he was finally over it . Still, the innuendos of his old friend embarrassed him.

“Not everyone wants to see your dumb ballet, Vic. I’m sure Katsuki has better things to do.” Kevin rumbled in his deep voice. “Anyway, we’d better go.”

“What?” Victor blinked up at his boyfriend, surprised. “But you...oh. Oh yea. Ok. Um, bye Yuuri, catch you later.”

They stood and Kevin yanked Victor after him with a hand gripped around his wrist.

Yuuri was left blinking at the abrupt departure, hand still raised in farewell as they gathered their coats and swept out of the cafe. “Bye.”

~

_9:43pm  
shit, i think he might hit me this time_

_9:50pm  
Vitya? Are you ok?_

_9:51pm  
yea. scared.  
9:52pm  
can i come over?  
9:53pm  
i wont be a bother promise_

_9:54pm  
Of course you can dear. Do you need me to come get you?_

_9:55pm  
no! he wouldnt like that. i’m in the bathroom but i’ll go for a walk soon with makka and come over. can makka come too?_

_9:57pm  
Absolutely. I’ll wait up for you._


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor arrives at Yuuri’s apartment and fills his friend in on what happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright! Get ready to really get your hate on for Kevin! Thank you everyone who came back for this second try at this fic. And thank you for everyone who left kudos and commented. Your comments and kudos give me life, and make me want to write more things, so keep ‘em coming! 
> 
> On to chapter 2, darlings!!

Two tension-filled hours later, Yuuri opened the door to a haggard-looking Victor and a bouncing Makkachin. Victor’s hair was tangled and his eyes red-rimmed from crying. There was a small, angry-looking cut on his cheekbone, and his hands shook minutely on Makka’s leash.

“Oh honey. Come on, come in.” Yuuri gently drew his friend in and sat him down on the couch. “Can I fetch you some tea or something?”

“No. Maybe? I...I don’t know.” Victor’s voice was hoarse and lost sounding. Makkachin swiped at his hand with her tongue.

Yuuri gently squeezed Victor’s hand, then went to begin making two cups of tea. They were quiet as the water boiled. Yuuri set the mug down in front of Victor on the coffee table and then settled next to him, their thighs just brushing. Makka whined and snuggled up on Victor’s other side, her head in his lap.

“So, what happened?”

Victor jolted slightly and began to shake a bit harder. Yuuri held his hand out for Victor to take if he wanted, and squeezed gently when Victor laced their fingers together. “H-he was m-mad. Because I told you about our fight. He...he said I shouldn’t be talking to you about...about private stuff.”

“Oh god, Vitya, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have mentioned it in the cafe.”

Victor shook his head. “No, it was my fault. I should have told you not to say anything. And I shouldn’t have talked back. I know how he gets when I talk back. But I just...I was trying to explain that I always talk to you, and that we’ve been best friends ever since we met. Not talking to you would be like...like not talking to a piece of my soul! It’s ridiculous.”

“You know, he’s wrong to blame you for that. You should always feel free to talk to your friends.” 

A small shrug. “I dunno. Maybe he’s right. He usually is, and I’m always wrong.”

“No!” Yuuri squeezed Victor’s hand again to emphasize his refusal. “You aren’t always wrong. And even if you were, you don’t deserve to be yelled at and belittled and this.” Yuuri placed a gentle finger under the cut on Victor’s cheek. “Did he do this?”

“Y-yea. I mean! I don’t think he meant to! He just threw a dish at the bathroom door where I was hiding and I opened it just as he did, and a shard flew at my face.”

“He threw something at you??” Yuuri’s face probably betrayed his horror because Victor’s head shrank down between his shoulders a bit.

“Yes.” Victor’s voice was very small. “You think I should leave him don’t you.”

“Vitya, this isn’t right. You deserve to be treated with respect and love, not like a misbehaving child. And regardless, no one should ever be physically trying to hurt you. Accident or not, he was throwing things at you. You shouldn’t be living in fear of your partner.”

“I-I know. You’re probably right. It’s just. Hard.”

Yuuri was almost surprised by this simple statement. Always before, when he and Kevin had fought and Yuuri had to pick up the pieces, Victor had rejected even the hint that maybe their fights weren’t healthy. He always had an excuse for why the fight was his own fault and not Kevin’s, or an explanation for Kevin’s behavior. Never before had Victor even entertained the idea of leaving Kevin out loud. He must be truly terrified to be talking about it now. Yuuri gathered him close and held him gently.

“I know, dear. I know it is. But I’m here for you, and so is Phichit. And you know Chris, Leo, and the guys will all support you too.”

“Where would I even go?”

“You always have a place here. Or, if not with us, Chris has an extra room I’m sure he’d lend you. Makka and his cat might not get along great, but it might do temporarily.”

“You’d really let me move in here?”

“Of course! You’re my best friend, Victor. I’d do anything to help you, you know that.”

Victor hung his head, the long tangled strands of his hair hiding his expression. “I don’t want to think about it tonight.”

“That’s ok. Stay on my couch as long as you like. We can talk about it in the morning.”

“Won’t you have to leave for an early rehearsal?” Victor peered at him worriedly.

“Nope. I’ll email my students tonight and let them know we’re cancelling rehearsal. It’s still early in the season, they’ll be alright.”

“Oh no. You shouldn’t-”

“Sh. You’re more important than any damn rehearsal.”

Victor shrank back a little and dipped his head, but he nodded in acceptance. Yuuri gathered him into another quick hug, then rose to fetch the spare pillows and blankets Victor had used only a few days before. It didn’t take long to settle Victor on the couch with Makka arranged at his feet and turn out the lights. But in his own bed, it took Yuuri a long time to fall asleep, worrying and fretting over his friend’s situation, the only possible solution, and Kevin’s likely reaction to Victor leaving him.

Kevin definitely wouldn’t let Victor go without a fight. Yuuri squared his jaw. He was prepared to fight, physically if necessary, to protect Victor and help him heal. After all, Victor was his best friend.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big changes happen in Victor’s life. Luckily he has Yuuri and Phichit there to support him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies. Sorry I’m late, I meant to post this yesterday but the day just got away from me and as I was laying in bed I went “oh shoot!” But here it is now for you, a shiny new chapter of angst! I promise, the fluff is coming soon!
> 
> Meanwhile, there is a small scene of very brief physical violence at the end of this chapter, so if that bothers you beware.
> 
> If you like this, leave me some love, it fuels my writing! 💕

Yuuri woke to a gentle clattering and soft conversation from the kitchen. Stumbling out of his room, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he found Victor and Phichit sitting at the kitchen island sipping from steaming mugs. He knew without looking that Phichit’s contained sweet, milky tea, and Victor’s contained coffee with enough sugar in it to make the spoon stand up.

“Mornin,’” Yuuri mumbled at his friends. 

“Morning Yuuri!” Victor and Phichit caroled in unison.

“Oh god,” Yuuri pressed a hand to his forehead and squinted at them. “Don’t do that, it’s creepy.”

“Sorry,” Victor looked contrite and a little worried. 

Phichit merely continued to look amused. “So, I hear we’re soon to have a new roommate.”

“Oh god, I’m sorry Peach, I should’ve asked you before I offered but he’s really-“

Phichit cut him off with a wave of his hand. “Never mind that, I understand. You know I would say yes anyway. Where is he going to stay, on the couch?”

“No, I figured he could set up the spare futon in the dance studio. It’s really a third bedroom with a lot of mirrors anyway, it’ll be fine for now.”

“Are you really sure about this Yuuri? I-I don’t want to be any trouble. I’m feeling much better about it this morning anyway, I’m sure I was just being oversensitive last night and he didn’t mean-“

Yuuri set his coffee cup down with a click that cut Victor off. He dug out his phone from his pocket, flicking open their messages. “You sent me these, Victor. Even if he didn’t actually hit you this time, you shouldn’t be living in fear that he will. And look.” Yuuri turned on the camera and put it in selfie mode, holding it like a mirror to Victor’s face and pointing at the pink cut on his cheek. “He hurt you, and he’s only going to get worse. I don’t want to be worried that some day he’s going to really lose his temper and put you in the hospital.”

“Oh.” Victor’s voice was barely audible. “You...really think I’m doing the right thing?”

“Yes, sweetheart. I really do. And so does Phichit, right?”

Phichit nodded somberly in support. 

“Now come on. Let’s eat breakfast and then go rent a moving-truck.”

“Ok. But what if...what if Kevin doesn’t want to let me go?”

“Then we’ll protect you. We’ll get Chris to come over and help us too. You’re not alone.”

Victor sipped at his coffee, mouth downturned at the corners. He lifted hollow blue eyes. “Are you sure I’m not just overreacting? I mean, it’s just a little fight. Couples have them all the time. Is it really something I should break up with him over?”

Phichit laid a gentle hand on Victor’s shoulder. “Look, you don’t have to break up with him if you don’t want to. Nobody is going to tell you what to do. But given how often he kicks you out as ‘punishment’ and all this last night, wouldn’t it be nice to have a safe place where you could store your stuff and keep Makka? Someplace he doesn’t control while you two work things out.”

Victor nodded slowly. “That’s true. But...I bet he’ll be mad when I move out. Even madder than he is now.”

“Well,” Yuuri waved his hands a little helplessly. “If he’s mad, then maybe that’s another sign that something is wrong. Sweetheart, this isn’t how adults treat each other. If Phichit moved out right now, of course I’d be sad, but I wouldn’t end our friendship over it. I would respect that he made a choice for himself and let it go.”

“Yea.” Victor bowed his head, shaking minutely. “I just don’t know what to do anymore.”

Yuuri stroked a gentle hand through the long silver locks. “Come live with us, like college all over again. It’ll be fun. And from there we can figure it out. You’re not alone.”

“Yea, we got your back buddy. Whatever you need from us!” Phichit piped up.

Victor’s eyes filled with tears and he smiled waveringly at them. “Thanks guys. T-that really means a lot.”

~  
With four able young men, packing up Victor’s belongings really only took a few hours. Almost all of the furniture had been Kevin’s when Victor moved in, so really there were just clothes, books, Makkachin’s bed and toys, and a few knick knacks that were just Victor’s. Anything they had bought together, Victor insisted on leaving. When it came down to it, it was a mere half dozen boxes and about as many bags full of clothing. Victor also insisted on leaving a note, which he agonized over for about forty minutes, but they managed still to finish removing every bit of Victor’s life from Kevin’s apartment with plenty of time to spare before he got home from work.

Phichit and Yuuri’s condo was a three/two on the third floor. The elevator facilitated the toting of boxes, and they stacked them neatly in the corner of Victor’s new room, an empty airy space with a wall of mirrors. 

“What do you think?” Yuuri asked as they put the last box down and Phichit wrestled the spare futon out of the closet. “Anything you need? If you’re gonna be here a while, you’ll probably need to invest in a new bed, but for now you’re welcome to our futon as long as you need it.”

Victor looked like he was about to cry. “I don’t know what I did to deserve all of you. How am I ever going to repay you?”

The futon thumped at their feet and Phichit threw an arm around Victor’s shoulders. “That’s what friends do, buddy. They have your back. And we’ve got yours, no matter what. Ok?”

“But-“ Victor cut himself off, looking around the room at Yuuri spreading out the bed and fluffing the sheets, at Chris hanging his clothes in the closet, at Phichit beside him. The tears overflowed again. “Thank you all. I love you guys.”

~  
Over the next couple days, Victor settled into the spare room. He stopped jumping at every unexpected noise, began to properly unpack as if he meant to stay, and settled into a bit of a routine for himself. Being more naturally an early riser, Victor began to cook breakfast every morning. The first time he did it, he looked apprehensive, asking Yuuri if he was sure it was ok that he’d decided to do that. But Phichit and Yuuri’s sleepily delighted expressions and enthusiastic devouring of the simple breakfast of bacon and eggs seemed to put him at ease. 

So on the fourth evening, when a knock sounded at the door and Victor cheerfully declared “I’ll get it!” as he walked down the hall, Yuuri didn’t think anything of it. He yawned and stretched sleepily, wondering vaguely if Phichit would want to play a video game with him after he finished the dinner dishes. However, the sounds that followed had him catapulting off the couch, no longer drowsy.

“I should have known, you little slut. You always run to Katsuki when you’re in trouble!!” Kevin’s voice snarled.

Victor’s tiny voice stuttering out “K-kevin?” was nearly cut off by the sound of a resounding slap.

“Don’t you ‘Kevin’ me. Get your stupid dog and let’s go, you are in so much trouble!”

And then Yuuri was there, all of his pent up anger and wiry dancer’s strength grabbing the taller man by his collar and shoving him bodily into the door frame with a thud.

“Don’t you ever touch him again, Kevin.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri Does Something about Kevin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently being late this week is just my brand. I dunno, even when the thing is all finished apparently I can’t stick to a posting schedule. Anyway, here’s the next chapter for you all. Any Sarazanmai fans may recognize a couple of side characters here, because I Can. ;)
> 
> Leave me some love if you’re enjoying this story, the kudos and comments keep me going!
> 
> Edit 8/13/20: This piece now has art, thanks to my lovely supporters! I commissioned Twiglightdragon to make a piece for the final scene, and it turned out lovely! It’s posted in the story itself! Be sure to go give Twigs some love!

Yuuri glanced over his shoulder briefly, taking in the reddened patch on Victor’s flushed cheeks and the way Phichit had come up and put a protective arm around Victor. Makka was pressed tightly against Victor’s leg, ears low and whining at the yelling. Turning his attention back to Kevin, Yuuri pressed him harder into the wood as Kevin opened his mouth to a furious retort.

“Who the hell do you think you are Katsuki? He’s my boyfriend, he’ll do what I say and get what he deserves!”

“He’s not your boyfriend anymore. And no one deserves to be hit, though I may make an exception for you if you come near him again.”

Kevin’s face turned bright red, either with rage or lack of airflow, or both. “What the hell do you mean he’s not…? Says who? Did you put him up to this?”

“Says me.” Victor’s voice was small but steady. “I left, and I’m not coming back Kevin. Don’t...don’t try to talk to me again.”

Abruptly, Kevin’s face took on a wounded, pleading look. “Aw, come on punkin. You can’t leave me, I-I’ll never get on without you I-”

With a small heave, Yuuri twisted and threw Kevin out into the hall. “Get out. If you try to talk to him any more I’ll have you arrested.”

Yuuri threw a final contemptuous glance at the man on the floor and then shut the door firmly in his face, locking it and steadfastly ignoring the subsequent pounding and yelling. Grimly, he took out his cell phone and dialled 911, giving a brief run-down of the situation and description of Kevin to the dispatcher. Hanging up, Yuuri turned toward the living room where Phichit was sitting beside Victor and talking soothingly to him. Yuuri strode into the living room and Phichit rose smoothly.

“I’ll make us all some tea, I think,” Phichit said and moved away to the kitchen.

Yuuri sat down beside where Victor was hunched, head hanging between his shoulders and hands clasped over the back of his neck as if to protect it while Makka licked worriedly at his cheek. Gently, Yuuri placed a protective arm around Victor’s shoulders.

“Are you ok?”

Victor lifted a tear-stained face up and looked into Yuuri’s eyes. “Did I do the right thing? What if…”

“Shhh” Yuuri gathered Victor into his arms. “You deserve to do what’s right for you, and being treated like that isn’t healthy for anyone.”

“He just looked so sad at the end.”

“Are you sad?”

“No? I mean I’m sad to lose a four year relationship, but I-I don’t think I’ve loved Kevin for a long time now. I was just too afraid to leave and be alone.”

At that moment they were interrupted by a crisp knock at the door and a new voice announcing, “Police!”

Yuuri went to open the door, leaving Victor huddled on the couch. A tall, handsome blonde with very tan skin contrasting his blue uniform and white teeth cast him a sharp yet friendly smile. His name tag read Niiboshi.

“Hello, are you the resident who reported a disturbance?”

Behind Officer Niiboshi a tall dark haired officer with glasses was restraining Kevin against the opposite wall. Yuuri swallowed nervously.

“Y-yes. He um, was trying to get into my apartment and remove my roommate against his will.”

Kevin started to shout “That’s a lie, he’s my boyfmgmmf” but the other officer pressed his face to the wall and spoke in a low stern voice, commanding him to be quiet.

Officer Niiboshi had glanced back but returned his attention to Yuuri now. “Some sort of domestic disturbance I take it?”

“Yes, um, my friend was in a relationship with Kevin. But he left and the guy won’t take ‘No’ for an answer and my friend was afraid for his personal safety because of his actions.”

The officer gave a little nod, making a note on his notepad. “Ok, we’ll take him in. You folks don’t have to worry. Here’s my card if you think of anything else or if your friend wants to press assault charges.”

“Thank you Officer”, Yuuri smiled with relief to see the quiet officer haul Kevin away down the hall, still protesting and complaining.

Yuuri closed and locked the door and went to sit back beside a shaken-looking Victor. “Hey. It’s ok. He’s gone now.”

Victor turned his face into Yuuri’s shoulder and cried quietly for a while. Yuuri smoothed the long silver hair draped over Victor’s shoulder and patted his back with the other hand while Makka placed her head in Victor’s lap and whined softly. Finally, Yuuri spoke in a low, calming voice.

“Do you remember how when I got anxious in college, we used to go to the studio and dance together? I know you haven’t really danced at all for a while, but maybe a session in the studio would help?”

The silver head pressed tight to Yuuri’s shoulder nodded ever so slightly. A voice muffled by tears and cloth whispered “I’d love to, but I don’t think any studios are open.”

“Vitya, I’m a professor. I have a key to the college studios for whenever I need it. And I think you need it.”

At that, Victor lifted his head and gazed at him with distressed blue eyes, red rimmed and damp. ”Really? It would be alright?”

“Definitely. Come on, go get your dance clothes on and let’s head over there.”

Victor threw himself at Yuuri one more time, mumbling an indistinct “I don't deserve you” into his neck, before releasing him and rising to do as he was bid. Yuuri followed him down the hall to his own room to change. It had been many years since they had danced together, but despite the distressing circumstances, Yuuri realized he was really looking forward to the prospect.

~  
Warming up in the studio with Victor felt like returning home after a long trip. They warmed up in a comfortable silence, automatically helping each other perfect their stretches. Victor looked lost in his head as Yuuri put on a playlist of piano and violin duets. The first strains of a cover of a video-game song Yuuri liked sounded through the studio and Yuuri reached for Victor’s hand, squeezing it gently to get his attention. Victor smiled at him and they began to move together, letting the music flow gently through their limbs. It started slow, but soon they were circling each other, dashing away and coming back together with fast, intricate steps. Victor was a little out of sync, clearly not quite feeling the triumphant theme, but he still moved with an intense beauty, hair flowing behind him like a silver cape. As the song went on, his movements relaxed somewhat and he transitioned smoothly to the next song with Yuuri. This was a simpler song, a sprightly violin waltz. They moved into the steps with the ease of long familiarity. Yuuri spun Victor around, trading off leading with him until Victor began to concentrate more on him.

The more sedate pace of the waltz gave Yuuri the chance to speak. “Is it helping?”

“Hm?” Victor’s air of abstraction finally dissipated a little, and he focused on Yuuri.

“Dancing.”

“Oh.” Victor’s nose scrunched adorably. “Yea. Some. I-I just keep thinking, I’m not sure why I stopped. Dancing, especially with you, was such a huge part of my life and I just...stopped.”

Yuuri chewed at his lower lip as they spun, formulating his answer. “It was Kevin, wasn’t it?”

“Not everything bad that happened to me is because of Kevin!” Victor hunched his shoulders defensively and refused to meet Yuuri’s eyes.

Yuuri hummed noncommittally as the music changed again, switching to a quietly contemplative piano piece. They drifted away from each other, each dancing on their own. Yuuri kept an eye on Victor, whose face was twisted in a scowl of part concentration, and part annoyance. After a minute or two of silent dancing, Victor drifted over into Yuuri’s vicinity and stopped, staring at his feet.

“Kevin hated my dancing.”

“I know.” Yuuri gathered Victor into his arms, stroking the sweaty silver hair. “You don’t have to do what he wants anymore. You’re your own man now.”

“Yea.”

They stood in a loose embrace until the music clicked over to a tango, and Yuuri couldn’t help the way his hips twitched a little. Victor drew back, face impassive as the slow intro twisted around them, and drew Yuuri into his arms in a proper dancer’s hold again. They slid slow and sensuous across the floor. The beat abruptly picked up and they twisted around each other, eyes locked together and expressions serious. The full orchestra entered behind the violin and Victor was lifting Yuuri off the floor and swinging him. Yuuri’s heart thudded in his chest as they danced, unable to look away from each other. The tango concluded with a grand crescendo and Yuuri backed away gasping, feeling like he had just been released from some sort of spell. Victor released his hold on Yuuri almost reluctantly.

“I’m…not sure I remember how to be my own person anymore,” Victor admitted into the silence between songs.

The music ran on without them while Yuuri cocked his head, panting a bit. “You’ll figure it out. You’re so strong. And you don’t have to do everything all at once. Just, take your life back a little a time.”

“But what if I screw it up? I’m always screwing things up.”

Yuuri scowled a bit. “You are not, that’s Kevin speaking in your head. If you do screw up, it’s not the end of the world. You just fix it and move on. It’ll be ok.”

Victor snorted. “When did you get so calm about this stuff?”

“Ah...I’m not really.” Yuuri gave an embarrassed shrug. “I’m just better at knowing the right things to say. Years of therapy means I know this stuff, even if sometimes my dumb brain doesn’t.”

Victor came over and wrapped his arms around Yuuri’s waist, laying his head on Yuuri’s shoulder. “How did I ever get so lucky to have a best friend like you?”

Yuuri blushed hotly and shrugged, at a loss for how to respond. Victor squeezed him tighter and nuzzled into his shoulder a little bit.

“Really, I don’t know what I would do without you, Yuuri. You’ve...you’ve saved me and you continue to be so nice to me. I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. Thank you.”

The first quiet strains of Salut d’Amour filtered from the sound system, and Victor turned them so they were chest to chest, smiling down into Yuuri’s red face. “Last dance of the night?”

All Yuuri could do was nod and follow Victor’s lead, his head in a whirl of emotions. Rage at Kevin and love for Victor warred in his chest with embarrassment and worry and just a hint of anxious whirling. They fell into the slow rhythm, bodies moving in perfect tandem. The song wound around them quietly, and there were no more words, just movement and feeling and the rush of blood in their ears.

Afterwards, they locked up the studio in silence and returned to the apartment, greeted at the door by an excited Makkachin. In the hall, Victor pressed a brief kiss to Yuuri’s cheek and then disappeared into his room with Makka.

Yuuri did not sleep much that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The pieces Victor and Yuuri dance to are [Nier](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AyY0z_u5Tc), [Midnight waltz](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdsxy932Ipc), [beloved piano piece](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LUB7yk_5rs), [ tango de los exilados](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=empw5Nh7p_Q), [Salut d Amour](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecM7_3rs5gU).


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there are personal appearance changes and bed sharing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Gif of a man balling up a piece of paper and throwing it over his shoulder* Welp. So much for schedules. I’m sorry, apparently I just suck at schedules. I’ll keep trying to post twice a week whenever I can remember though? And this fic is finished, so it’s not a matter of worrying if I’ll post the end, just when I remember to do it!
> 
> Also, I’ve been seriously remiss in thanking Bow_Woww for her help with beta work for this! She was a lifesaver while I was writing this and definitely helped me a lot! Thanks dear! 💕

The next morning Victor looked almost back to his normal self, eyes only slightly reddened from crying as they all sat around the breakfast table. They ate in relative quiet, broken only by soft morning murmurs to pass the pepper and grab the milk. Phichit left first, hurrying off to his office for the day with a wave and a cheerful reminder that it was Yuuri’s turn to cook dinner. Yuuri was next, off to an early rehearsal with the college dance troupe. 

As Yuuri pulled on his shoes, he spoke over his shoulder to the pajama-clad Victor in the kitchen. “What’s your plan today?”

Victor hummed thoughtfully. “No work today. I think I’m going to just take Makka to the dog park and then go get my hair trimmed. It’s been kind of a while, and my ends are splitting.” Victor pouted at this. 

“Sounds lovely,” Yuuri straightened and smiled at him. “Would you mind popping into the store and picking up some pork cutlets? I’ll make katsudon for dinner if you do.”

“Wow, really?” Victor’s whole face lit up when he was excited, and it always made something warm bubble in Yuuri’s chest to see it.

“Yes really. You deserve something nice after the rough week you’ve had.”

Victor blushed and stared awkwardly down at his hands. “It’s….it’s not so bad, I mean I-well it was but I d-don’t…”

As Victor stuttered and stumbled to a stop Yuuri walked over and gave him a squeezing goodbye hug, murmuring softly, “It’s ok to take care of yourself. You’re a person and deserve good things too.”

When Yuuri walked out the door, Victor was sitting at the table with his head bowed, Makka’s head in his lap. Throughout the day, Yuuri couldn’t get that image out of his head. He taught classes, worked on grading, met with faculty and still it remained at the back of his mind, how sad Victor had looked. How small and defeated he had looked. In odd moments, Yuuri wondered what he could do to help Victor get through this. Were there tutorials he could read about how to help a friend heal from an abusive relationship? Maybe he could ask one of his acquaintances in the Psych department for advice. Maybe Phichit had suggestions.

The flowers were an impulse buy. There was a display outside the student-center of roses and carnations being sold by some student organization raising money for something or other. Yuuri passed by on the way to his car, and was arrested by a stunning arrangement of three blue roses and purple carnations. Blue roses were Victor’s favorite flowers, and before he had even thought the gesture through, Yuuri had paid for them and was carrying them carefully to the car. Just something to cheer his friend up, nothing more.

“I’m home,” Yuuri called as he opened the door. Makkachin rushed to greet him in a flurry of brown curls and bouncing ears and he giggled a little as she knocked into him. One unexpected perk of Victor living here was having a pup to greet him at the door now. “Victor? Phichit?”

There was no answer, but as Yuuri turned the corner into the kitchen he saw Victor standing there, looking slightly apprehensive by the stove. 

“Oh! You are home! Excellent. Look, I got you-” As Yuuri rambled on cheerfully, it slowly dawned on him that something was different. He cut himself off suddenly and blurted, “Your hair!!”

Victor’s shoulders hunched further. “Y-yea. What do you think?”

Yuuri’s mouth hung open in shock for a while. Victor had always had long hair, for as long as Yuuri had known him. It was one of the things that made him Victor, that long distinctive silver fall of hair. Seeing it like this, cropped close to his head with just a little falling over his face was almost jarring. And yet, he still looked handsome as ever. Less ethereal and more solidly masculine now.

“W-wh- uh wow. I...uh. It looks um good. Really, I-I’m just surprised!”

“Yea.” Victor ran a nervous hand through the short mane, stopping short and lowering his hand as if even he wasn’t used to it yet. “I just. I wanted to do something different. Something to really change from what...what Kevin saw. He loved my long hair, said it made me look like his Princess. He, um, would pull it when er wh-when he was, we were, y-know.”

Was Victor blushing? He was. Victor never usually hesitated to give Yuuri blow-by-blow accounts of his love-life, much to Yuuri’s chagrin. The fact that Yuuri had long known exactly how Victor liked best to be taken (on his back, with his ankles over the other man’s shoulders) had been a source of anguish, particularly when his crush was at its worst. But here, now, he seemed shy.

Yuuri moved closer and reached out a hand to run it gently through Victor’s fringe, sweeping it to the side so that both beautiful blue eyes stared down at him. “It looks good. It’s a good change. It’ll be a shock to a lot of people, but you always love surprising people. And this...this suits you.”

“So…” Victor bit his lip and continued. “So you still think I’m pretty?”

Yuuri sighed. “Everyone thinks you’re gorgeous and you know it.”

“But you still think I’m attractive, right?”

It made no sense for Victor to be so uncertain, not when he was usually quite vain about his looks. But maybe the haircut had changed things. Yuuri smiled warmly at him. “Of course. I’ve always thought you were beautiful, and I’ll still think you’re beautiful when you’re fifty and bald!”

“Yuuuuriiiii,” Victor whined, hand covering his hair protectively. “I’m not going to go bald!!”

It was good to see Victor perk up a bit at the old tease. Then Yuuri remembered the flowers in his hand. 

“Oh! I got you these, by the way.”

Victor gasped as Yuuri presented the flowers to him, cooing, “Yuuuuri, you’re so sweet! And how did you find my favorite?”

He swooped in and kissed Yuuri’s cheek affectionately, and now it was Yuuri’s turn to blush and stutter.

“O-oh, they j-just were selling them on the way home, it’s no big deal, I just thought they might make you smile after...after everything.”

Victor’s huge grin was everything Yuuri could have hoped for.

While Victor found a vase and arranged his flowers on the table, Yuuri started preparations for katsudon. They chatted casually about this and that, Victor’s return to work the next day at the cafe, and how Yuuri’s classes were going. It was warm and cozy, and incredibly domestic. Phichit came home just in time for dinner, and they all sat around the table chatting for a while before bed. 

~

“Yura?” Victor’s voice was soft and hesitant. 

“Mnf Vitya?” In the dim light of his bedroom Yuuri could just make out Victor standing hesitantly in the doorway, twisting his sleep shirt in his hands. 

“I-I had a nightmare. Can I-“ 

Before Victor could finish stumbling through his request Yuuri lifted the covers and opened his arms. Victor hung back for a moment. 

“A-are you sure?”

Yuuri’s voice scratched with sleep. “Get in here it’s cold.”

Victor slid between the sheets gingerly, keeping a slight distance. Half-asleep, Yuuri tugged him closer and wrapped his arms around him. Victor settled in and reflexively Yuuri began stroking his hair, marveling slightly at the shortness. 

“Wan’ talk bout it?”

The silky head moved in a negative manner under his fingers. After another moment Victor murmurs into his chest, “It was about Kevin.”

The rhythm of Yuuri’s hand didn’t falter, but he squeezed Victor a bit tighter. “I’m sorry. I know it’s hard. I’m here if you need me, for anything.”

Victor’s arms tightened pleasantly around his waist in reply, and the two drifted back to sleep.

The next morning, they were still wrapped up in each other. It shouldn’t have felt so nice, but Yuuri couldn’t regret giving his friend the comfort he had needed, even if waking up wrapped in the arms of the most beautiful man he had ever known was doing terrible things for his heart. They weren’t like that, and they never had been. They were best friends, and Yuuri’s heart needed to stop reverting to childish fantasies about living together and sleeping next to him.

They didn’t talk much as Victor got up and went back to his own room to get dressed for his shift at the cafe. Yuuri did his best to shove it out of his own mind as he prepared for his own day. It was nothing. It meant nothing.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alternatively titled “Boner Induced Panic Attacks”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! An update! I said I was going to try to keep to two a week, so here’s the second for this week. I had a little down time between events at US Nationals, so I figured I should post. 
> 
> With this chapter, we are officially halfway done! I'm super excited about this chapter actually, as it has one of the scenes that I wrote very early on and helped me flesh out Victor and Yuuri's relationship a bit. Also, I hope this chapter shows that just because Yuuri is fairly well adjusted in this 'verse, it doesn't mean his anxiety is just gone. Cause that's not how anxiety works. Also, this is the chapter that starts the fic earning it's Mature rating on AO3. As ever, thanks are due Comet for her excellent beta work!

“Yuuri, Yuuri, he’s here, _he’s here_!!” Victor’s voice echoed through the phone, tinged with panic. 

“Huh? Who’s where?”

“Kevin! He’s here, at the cafe, and oh god what if he tries to talk to me?”

“What, are you sure?”

“Y-yea, I’m positive. What do I do, _what do I do_?” The little hitching sob at the end of the question nearly broke Yuuri’s heart.

“Ok, it’s ok sweetheart, take a deep breath. Can he see you?”

“N-no, as soon as I saw him I hid in the back room. I d-don’t think he saw me.” Victor’s breathing was coming in fast spurts.

“Ok, shhh, breathe with me, ok? Deep breaths, in….and out….everything’s going to be ok.” Yuuri clamped all his will into making his own voice as calm as possible, not letting any of his own swirling worry filter through in his voice. “Everyone you work with knows you two had a bad break up, right?”

“Yea.” Victor hiccuped on a small sob. “I don’t think they’ll let him back here. I mean, it’s employees only. But I can’t come out, what am I supposed to do Yuuri?”

“Shh, ok, just stay there. I’m coming to get you, ok?” As he spoke, Yuuri had been tossing things into his bag and hunting down his keys. “Don’t worry sweetheart, it’ll be ok. Just keep talking to me, I’m coming.”

Slamming his office door behind him, Yuuri only just remembered to lock it before taking off at a run toward where his car was parked. Victor stayed on the line with him, but they didn’t speak much after that. Yuuri broke about fifteen traffic laws but he managed to make it to the cafe in a record ten minutes from his office. Bursting into the cafe, he looked around frantically but didn’t spot Kevin’s distinctive autumn-colored hair. Deeming it safe, for the moment, he went to the back part of the counter and waved at the manager, Sara, where she was making espresso drinks. 

“Hey, Victor?” Yuuri murmured into the phone, “You can come out, I’m here ok?”

“Ok.” Victor’s voice was very small, but after a few minutes he emerged from the back room and made a bee-line for Yuuri. 

Yuuri hung up his phone and pocketed it, pulling Victor into a tight hug. Victor hugged him back, shaking minutely. After a moment, Yuuri pulled back and gently cupped his friend’s face.

“You want to go home?”

Shadowed blue eyes darted around a bit, looking lost. “I-I don’t know if I can, I still have three hours of my shift. I...I should stay.”

Sara approached, wiping her hands on her apron. “Hey, Vic you know we got your back. If you need to go home, I don’t mind. It should be quiet now that the lunch rush is over, we’ll be ok without you.”

“A-are you sure?”

Sara squeezed Victor’s arm. “Definitely. You’ve had a bad shock. Let Yuuri take care of you and we’ll see you tomorrow for your regular shift, ok?”

“Thanks Sara, I really appreciate it.” Victor sniffed and looked like he was on the verge of tears again. 

Thank goodness Victor had such an understanding boss. Yuuri steered his friend out to the car, already mentally composing the email he was going to send out cancelling his last class of the day. No way was he leaving Victor alone for the rest of the day to stew in the apartment and worry. 

~  
At home, Yuuri settled Victor on the couch then bustled around getting tea and fussing over blankets for him. Victor eventually insisted he was fine and didn’t need Yuuri to coddle him, at which Yuuri suggested they watch a movie to take their minds off of everything. Victor made the popcorn and they settled in to watch a cheesy rom-com and throw kernels of corn at the screen when the lines got too cliche, just like they used to do all the way back in high school. 

During a quiet part of the movie, Victor grew pensive and muttered, “I never thought I would be such a coward about this.”

“What?” Yuuri blinked, nonplussed. “What on earth do you mean?”

“I mean, first time seeing Kevin since the breakup and I run away. I’m not even totally sure that was him, I mean, I caught a glimpse and I just...vanished.”

“Victor, honey, that doesn’t make you a coward.”

Victor hunched his shoulders, staring unseeing at the tv. “I feel like a coward. If I was stronger I would have confronted him and told him off for coming to my place of work.”

Yuuri gathered Victor into his arms and held him close. “You are incredibly strong already, and you have nothing to prove. You don’t ever have to confront him unless you want to. Running away is a valid strategy given what he did to you. Nobody blames you for any of this.”

The dampness of tears and a shuddering breath combined with the firm clutch of Victor’s arms around him were all the response he got. They sat that way for a long while. Afterwards, Victor was subdued through dinner and some dance stretches that Yuuri led him through. It was easy to see that he was still shaken from the almost-encounter, and still beating himself up over it. Yuuri took every opportunity to try to comfort him with little touches and gentle squeezes to the hand. When Phichit came home, he and Yuuri were their usual cheerful selves, chatting and laughing, but Victor didn’t join in like he usually did, instead just watching them quietly. But he didn’t shrug off Yuuri’s touches either.

As they got ready for bed, Yuuri screwed up his courage and knocked gently at Victor’s bedroom door. “If you want, if you need to, you can sleep with me tonight.”

The relieved look in Victor’s eyes was all the answer he really needed. “Are you sure? I mean…”

“I’m sure. I promise.”

Victor followed him to his room and they settled into bed. Yuuri turned off the light and Victor snuggled up to his chest, clinging silently. It took a long time for Yuuri to fall asleep.  
~

Consciousness slowly stole over Yuuri. He was warm and comfortable with a soft weight pressed to his chest. The weight felt good, right even, curving into his body in all the right ways. When it shifted slightly, Yuuri’s body moved to grind back, his dick apparently having the same opinion of how the body, for it was a body, felt against him. A faint moan escaped his lips before his eyes snapped open. He flinched back from Victor, heart pounding and eyes wide awake. 

Oh god, he had been grinding against Victor, grinding his morning erection into Victor’s ass like an animal. Cautiously, Yuuri peeked over Victor’s shoulder to see if he was awake. Blessedly, Victor slumbered peacefully on, (and Yuuri resolutely did not think about how appealingly soft he looked), so Yuuri eased gently from the bed and dashed into the en suite. 

Bathroom door closed, Yuuri stared in betrayed dismay down at his cock. God, what kind of horrible person got turned on by snuggling their vulnerable sleeping friend? Ok, their hot vulnerable friend but still. He’d lived most of his life navigating Victor’s undeniable attractiveness. He had always had his latent attraction to Victor under control, and even moved beyond it in recent years. There was nothing romantic about it. Ok, so yes he loved Victor, but as a friend, that was it! And now he had woken up with his dick shoved in Victor’s ass and thank god Victor hadn’t been awake because how awkward would that have been? Except, what if Victor had just been pretending to sleep so as to avoid having That Conversation with him? Yuuri had probably ruined their entire friendship and then Victor would leave and be homeless and desperate and it was all Yuuri’s fault for not being in better control of his body. 

Victor found him huddled on the bathroom floor, tears running down his legs from where his face was pressed against his knees. Victor had knocked softly at first, but Yuuri could only manage a choked gasp in response, too caught in the panic to speak. Something must have alerted Victor as he pushed the door open and peeked inside. 

“Yuuri? Everything ok? You didn’t- Oh! Oh sweetheart what’s wrong?”

Victor crouched down in front of Yuuri, hands hovering but not yet touching. “Can I touch you?”

Yuuri took stock of himself through the fog of panic and nodded. The only plus side to this was that at least he wasn’t aroused anymore as Victor gathered him into his lap and rubbed soothing hands over Yuuri’s back. They were quiet and gradually Victor’s calm presence and gentle touches stemmed the flood of tears and calmed Yuuri’s racing heart. They sat there quietly, Yuuri curled into Victor’s chest with Victor’s strong arms curved protectively around him.

“Feeling better?”

Yuuri nodded silently, but turned his face a little more into Victor’s bare chest, breathing in his scent and letting it settle him more.

Victor continued, “Want to talk about it? That was a pretty bad one I guess.”

“No!” Yuuri definitely couldn’t talk about the cause of this attack with Victor. That would bring them right back around to friendship-ruining conversations concerning Yuuri’s traitor of a dick. “I-I mean, yes it was bad, but I don’t...don’t want to talk about it. It’s...it was nothing, I just...can we pretend this didn’t happen?”

There was a sceptical silence before Victor hummed and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of his head. “Ok. If that’s what you want, we won’t talk about it. Want to get some breakfast?”

“Yes please.”

Victor helped Yuuri to his feet and then went to start making breakfast while Yuuri tried to repair the damage his crying fit had done to his face. It was not an auspicious start to the day, and Yuuri was in a rather low mood when he emerged from his room to settle at the breakfast table.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Victor takes some more steps toward returning to dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyyy look at me posting on time! Whaaaat? I know, I’m shocked too. Anyway, hope you’re ready for some good old fashioned pining from the boys!

Life went on. Victor still slept in Yuuri’s bed most nights, and they still didn’t talk about the fact that they almost always woke tangled in each other. They emphatically did not talk about the morning wood this inevitably aroused in one or another or both of them. Victor continued getting up early to make breakfast before returning (shakily at first) to work at the cafe. Phichit was absorbed in his photography as always. And Yuuri sank back into his round of classes and rehearsals and the start of a new production of Swan Lake that he was in charge of. They settled into a comfortable routine, the three of them seeing each other at breakfast and then again at dinner where they talked over their day or occasionally whined about their day if it had been particularly trying. 

“And I can’t find a suitable Prince Siegfried! All these talented dancers around the university, but none have the right _presence_ for the Prince. But I can’t begin blocking the choreography without him, he’s too important. It’s so frustrating!” Yuuri was complaining one evening, while Phichit fixed dinner. Yuuri was sat at the kitchen table snapping green beans, while Victor played on his phone and Makka sat hungrily at Phichit’s feet, ever hopeful.

Phichit’s reply was somewhat distracted as he concentrated on the chicken he was preparing. “Why don’t you just dance it yourself?”

“What?” Yuuri reacted with as much horror as if Phichit had suggested puppies should be banned. “I can’t! I definitely don’t have the leading-man quality it needs, and besides, it’s really hard to choreograph and direct while also dancing. Not impossible, but it’s definitely made harder the more prominent the role.”

“What do you mean you couldn’t dance the leading man? You’re an amazing dancer, Yuuri!” Victor’s frown was somewhat disapproving. “You know you shouldn’t put yourself down like that.” Phichit made an agreeing noise from the stove.

“I’m not,” Yuuri flashed a small reassuring smile. “I promise. I just know my limitations. If this was a different production maybe, but I’m no Prince Siegfried, tall, blond and princely.”

Victor bit his lip, then hesitantly suggested, “Well, if all you really need is someone to stand in while you do the choreography, at least I could help with that. I’m out of practice, but I know how to follow choreography and I can do the lifts and things so the rest of the cast doesn’t have to be held back while you keep looking.”

Awe and surprise flooded Yuuri. How could he have not seen what a perfect solution this was? Victor had even danced the part of Siegfried back in a college production they had been part of. “Vitya, that’s perfect! You should dance the part! You were an amazing Siegfried before!”

“What?” Victor squawked, “No no, I just meant for choreography! N-not...I couldn’t, I’m so out of practice I’d...why would you even want me? I’m not a student or a pro!”

Yuuri shook his head. “No, you’ll be perfect. Come with me to rehearsal tomorrow. If you really don’t want to do it, of course I won’t force you, but I know you’ll be perfect. And you wanted to start dancing again. This is a perfect opportunity. It’s a professional show but it won’t be traveling so you’ll be paid but you won’t have to give up your cafe job either.”

“I...you’re serious about this, aren’t you?” Victor’s eyes were wide, his face a little pinched with nerves. 

“Definitely.”

“You should go for it, Victor. If Yuuri thinks you’ll do well, you will. He should know, he’s the professional and all,” Phichit chimed in from the stove.

“I.” Victor looked between them, then heaved a gulping breath. “Ok, I’ll go to rehearsal tomorrow, and you can see what you think. I-I’ll abide by your decision, Yuuri. If you really think I’m right after seeing me tomorrow, then I’ll do it.”

“Perfect!” Yuuri crowed. “You’re going to be amazing, I know it!”

~  
Just as Yuuri predicted, Victor fit perfectly into the production. The younger cast members welcomed him enthusiastically. A few of them looked at him with something like awe. Even after so many years, Victor’s name was still spoken about in the university halls for his prowess and promise as a student. Leo and Guang Hong especially seemed to hang on his every word. Victor, for his part, seemed to slide into the round of rehearsal with barely a ripple. He was serious and focused, taking directions easily and executing the bits of choreography Yuuri had ready with flair and assurance. More importantly, Victor was the very embodiment of “princely”, even in his worn t-shirt and sweatpants. The shirt was small and clung tightly to his muscles with sweat, and the sweatpants somehow managed to accentuate his ass in really distracting ways. His silver hair gleamed in the lights and his movements were elegant and controlled.

Yuuri wrenched his mind back to the task at hand, running through a bit of choreography with the girl who was cast as Odette. Ogling his best friend was not on his list of things to do this morning, or ever. A small part of his mind whimpered that if Victor looked this good in casual workout clothes, Yuuri was going to actually combust once Victor put on tights, but he managed to quash that voice ruthlessly. 

Clapping his hands, he gathered the attention of the dancers, congratulating them on a good rehearsal and reminding them of the next rehearsal time. Victor drifted closer to him, as the rest of the group moved away, preparing to leave. Yuuri flashed him a smile.

“You were amazing, just like I knew you would be Vitya.”

“Oh, well…” Victor blushed, twisting his hands in his shirt. “It did feel good to dance with a group, in an organized way again. I-I missed the camaraderie of a dance troupe.”

“So,” Yuuri grinned. “Think you want to stay on for the full run then? I really think you’d be amazing in the role, even more so now.”

“Are you sure you’re not just saying that because we’re friends?”

“No, definitely not. I wouldn’t lie to you.”

Victor stared intently at his toes for a moment before lifting his head to stare firmly into Yuuri’s eyes. “Ok. I-I’ll do it. I want to do it. For me. This is going to be good for me, I can feel it.”

Yuuri couldn’t help the swell of pride and affection that threatened to overtake him. “Yes it will. I’m so glad to be able to help you show off your dancing to the world again, sweetheart.”

Victor’s smile was small but very sweet. “Me too.”

~  
A new routine was established. Twice a week, Victor came to rehearsals in the morning and then worked an afternoon shift at the cafe. Yuuri got in the habit of driving Victor to work after rehearsal and then staying with his laptop to work in one of the squashy chairs in a corner. He definitely told himself it was a normal thing to work in a comfortable cafe, and he was not being a weirdo about it. Because this definitely had everything to do with the great lattes they served and nothing whatsoever to do with a certain silver-haired barista who he saw enough of at home so it made no sense for him to sit and pine over him at work. And it didn’t even count as pining, because he did not have feelings for Victor. 

One Thursday as Yuuri was sitting with his laptop open but his gaze firmly fixed on a point in Victor’s general direction (he was having a _break_ ), a flash of auburn hair caught his attention. Everything seemed to slow down a little, like in the middle of a horrible car crash. Kevin was right there, across the cafe, leaning on the counter in front of a terrified-looking Victor. Yuuri stood up, tossing his laptop into his seat and striding across the room to do...something. Anything to wipe that terrified look off Victor’s face. It must have only taken a minute for him to cross through the mostly-empty room, but it felt like it took an age. He arrived just in time to hear Kevin’s most placating and pleading voice.

“Hi Princess, I’ve really missed you. When are you coming home?”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something is Done about Kevin, and then Chris takes Victor out to celebrate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What even is time? I meant to post this yesterday, I really did, but the whole night just got away from me. I blame the book I was reading (Gail Carriger’s Competence, well worth the read). 
> 
> Anyway, here we go with all new content! This is where I had gotten up to when AO3 took this down before, so now any returning folks are getting the new updates! This chapter is the only one from Victor’s POV because it just didn’t work from Yuuri’s, and it’s one of the most fun I had writing too. But first, some angst before the fun!
> 
> Enjoy!

Everything seemed to slow down, like he was watching a horrible car-wreck playing out in front of him. His heart was pounding with fear at the first glimpse of Kevin’s face approaching him, and his palms were sweating. He managed not to drop the cup he was holding, but only just. Kevin walked up and leaned on the counter right in front of him, and this was the closest Victor had been to him since the night Yuuri threw him out into the hallway. Something lodged in his throat, possibly his heart.

“Hey Princess, when are you coming home? I’ve really missed you, ya know.” Kevin’s voice jolted through him, knocking something loose. 

Once, the petulant tone of Kevin’s would have made Victor give in and do whatever his ex wanted, and there was still that pull there. But overlaid on top of it and much stronger, was revulsion and fear. They were what had Victor opening his mouth, furious retorts lining up in his throat in a desperate bid to escape. What actually came out was a somewhat squeaky, “What are you doing here, Kevin?”

Kevin smirked. “What, I can’t come see my boyfriend at his place of work anymore? Are you still mad, babe?”

The ‘my boyfriend’ echoed in Victor’s head. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Yuuri drawing in a deep breath, fury blazing in his brown eyes. Victor had to get there first though, had to let loose in his own words of rage boiling through the fear and surprise. 

“I’m not your boyfriend anymore!” Victor hissed, relishing the look of shock on Kevin’s face. Had he ever used this tone of voice with his ex? “Wasn’t my moving out and breaking up with you enough of a clue that I’m done? Didn’t getting the cops called on you clue you in that we are over forever? Or are you too egotistical to realize when someone _doesn’t want you_? After everything you did to me, all the bullshit and yelling and violence you’re lucky I didn’t get a restraining order against you! So no! You can’t come in here anymore, Kevin!”

“What I did to _you_?” Kevin’s handsome face was ugly with rage. “You little whore, you are the one who-”

Kevin was cut off by a hand twisting his collar as Yuuri moved in and began bodily removing him. “No, you don’t get to use that kind of language toward Victor ever again. Get out Kevin.”

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Kevin gurgled. 

“Get out, and stay out Kevin. We’re done, and next time I see your face I’m filing for a restraining order, I’m not kidding.” Victor was proud of how even his voice was at that last pronouncement. Yuuri finished dragging him to the door and removing him, while Kevin struggled and yelled. 

Behind him, he heard Sara on the phone, seemingly talking to the police. Immediately the rage left him and he hunched his shoulders, hardly daring to glance about at the customers and see what kind of shocked and horrified faces they were giving him. Yuuri came back inside and made a beeline for Victor behind the counter, folding him into a silent hug. Victor clung on tight, shaking in every limb with adrenaline and a resurgence of fear.

A sympathetic Sara came over to them, placing a consoling hand on Victor’s shoulder. “Do you need to go home, Victor?”

With a last squeeze and a shuddering breath, Victor disengaged himself from Yuuri and shook his head. “No...no I can’t let him disrupt my day like that. I’ll be ok Sara. I’m...I’m really sorry about all this. I didn’t mean for my drama to spill over at work.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault. That guy should know better. After all you broke up with him, right?” Sara smiled gently at him.

Victor returned the smile shakily. “Yea. It just doesn’t seem to take real well. Maybe this time he’s got it.”

“I hope so.”

Victor returned to work, and Yuuri returned to his chair, eyes watchful. When it was time for Yuuri to go to his next class, Victor had to practically shove him out the door. Yuuri’s clear worry was sweet, but Victor didn’t need a baby-sitter.

~  
When Victor got home that afternoon, he reconsidered his stance on a baby-sitter. It wasn’t that he was _scared_ to be alone, exactly. It was just...the apartment was just so quiet with only him and Makka in it. Makka’s nails clicked against the floors, and it echoed through the house. Victor wandered through the rooms, fixing himself a drink, settling on the couch, and trying to ignore the urge to recheck that the door was locked firmly. Finally, just for something to distract himself, he called Chris.

“‘Allo.”

“Chris! How’s it going?”

“Victor! Long time no see? How’re you?”

Victor clutched the phone tight, Chris’s cheerful voice filling his ears and blocking out the oppressive silence of the apartment. “Oh, well, I’m ok. Could be better I guess?”

“Ah cheri, what has happened? Tell Uncle Chris all about it.”

“Chris, you’re younger than me, you can’t be my uncle.” Victor couldn’t help grinning at his ridiculous friend.

“You are avoiding the question.”

“Ah, it’s nothing really. Just, Kevin showed up at the cafe today.”

Chris’s voice immediately dropped from playful to angry. “What? That bastard really can’t take a hint can he?”

“I dunno. I hope he gets it now. I-I told him off for trying to act like we were going to get back together.” Victor’s voice was dejected even to his own ears, and he injected some false cheer. “Yuuri was there again though. He’s my hero.”

“Mmm, well congrats on telling him off at least. I’m proud of you.”

“Yea I guess.” Victor was silent for a long moment, and Chris waited patiently as always. “I’m doing the right thing by not giving him another chance, right Chris?”

Chris clicked his tongue. “Oh cheri, you absolutely are. That bastard doesn’t deserve a single thought from you. You’re right to move on. In fact, you should get out there and really start moving on. Let’s go out tomorrow night. Go to a club, dance with some hotties, maybe let one take you home for the night.”

Victor blinked. “Oh, I-I dunno...about one night stands…”

“Come oooon Vitya, we haven’t been out for ages! Let’s go have some fun! You don’t have to sleep with anyone if you don’t want to, though I think it’d be good for you, but you need to get out and let loose for a while. Shake the jerk out of your hair.”

“I-I guess. Um.” Victor thought about it. Clubbing with Chris had used to be fun, but he hadn’t been out since he’d started dating Kevin. Kevin had never liked clubs, and he wouldn’t let Victor go without him. It did sound like a good way to prove, to himself if nothing else, that he was moving on. “Y-yea. Yea, let’s do it. Tomorrow is good. You’ll come over and help me dress up?”

“But of course, cheri!” Chris’s voice practically dripping with a smirk. 

~  
The club was loud. Victor’s first impression was that somehow clubs had gotten noisier and more crowded since he had last been out with Chris. The heavy bass beat reverberated in his skull, and even though they’d only been here ten minutes he had been pressed up against more bodies than he ever expected to in an average night. Maybe this had been a mistake.

“I think this was a mistake.”

Chris rolled his eyes and shouted over the music, “Come get a drink and loosen up! Start dancing and you’ll have fun!”

Victor bit his lip but nodded, and followed Chris to the bar. One stiff drink later, he did feel about ready to dance. Abandoning their glasses, he let Chris drag him into the middle of the heaving mass of bodies that was the dance floor. A new song started and Victor let the beat move through him, making his body sway and twist beside Chris. Chris grinned and cheered and twisted beside him. It did start to make him feel better. The exhilaration and movement of the dance filled him like it always did with a sense of purpose and peace. 

Then there were other bodies sliding up against him, one in front and one behind. Hands gripped him and hips swayed with him, grinding against him. Victor fought his first urge to pull away from the other men and leaned into it, trying to let himself enjoy the feeling of another body pressed against him in a dirty grind. But it wasn’t the right body. 

Victor slipped away to the bar and had another drink, thinking maybe he just needed to loosen up a bit. Back on the dance floor, Chris was dancing with someone else, their bodies locked together and arms clasping each other. Pouting a little, Victor looked around. Another man was watching him, dark eyes reminding him a little of Yuuri. Sliding up towards the dark-eyed man, he began to dance, and didn’t bat the hands away that came up to grip his hips and pull him closer. When the song changed, he returned to the bar again.

With every drink and every dance he became more and more aware that this felt all wrong. The hands were the wrong size, and the hips weren’t just the right amount of plush under his grip. The movements were wrong, and all his partners were faceless placeholders in the dim strobing lights of the club. Victor found himself thinking longingly of elegant limbs, fluffy black hair, smoldering dark eyes, and a body that moved like music incarnate. In an effort to banish the thoughts, he returned to the bar again and again.

At five drinks; “Chris, nobody dances like my Yuuri.” 

At six drinks; “Why didn’t we bring Yuuri with us?”

After his eighth cocktail (something pink and sticky the bartender had handed over with a playful wink that failed to move him), Victor was draped over Chris’s shoulder outside, whining into his sweaty skin “...and his hair is so fluffy in the morning! And he gives the best snuggles. And he’s so strong. Chris do you have any idea how strong he is?”

“Yes yes, cheri. Yuuri is very admirable.” Chris sighed. “I think maybe it’s time to get you back home!”

“Oh, home is good. Home has Yuuri. Did you know I get to live with Yuuri again, Chris? Yuuri is the best.” Victor’s mouth stretched in a wide happy grin.

Chris just shook his head and flagged down a taxi.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Victor is very drunk and Yuuri makes an admission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go, the continuation of last chapter! We’re back to Yuuri’s point of view again, and Victor is still drunk to begin with. Shenanigans ensue, with the help of Chris and Phichit. Thanks are due to Pickleweasel and Owlsnipe for music suggestions, and of course as always to my dear Bow_woww for betaing!

It was a pretty average Friday night. Yuuri was living up to his reputation as a night owl and playing a video game until well after midnight. Phichit had fallen asleep in the armchair while watching him. And Victor...well normally Victor would be there, dozing on the couch behind Yuuri where Makka currently snoozed, but he had gone out with Chris. Now Yuuri was debating whether to stay up and wait for him or if that would be too weird. It’s not like Victor was beholden to him or anything, Yuuri just wanted to make sure he got home alright. Of course, he might not even come home, he might go to Chris’s. Or even go home with a stranger. For some reason, that thought twisted in Yuuri’s stomach, sour and painful. Victor could go home with strangers from the club if he wanted to. He was a free agent, for the first time in years, and he should be allowed to enjoy it. 

Yuuri still didn’t want him to do it. 

Just as Yuuri was finally psyching himself up to go to bed and not wait up, there was a commotion at the door. There were several thumps, then the sound of giggling, followed by extended scraping and scrabbling at the door lock. The tumblrs finally turned and Chris and Victor tumbled into the hallway, flushed with drink and giggles. Makkachin immediately jumped onto her master, knocking him loose-limbed into the door frame. He giggled and shoved her off with a clumsy caress.

“Yuuri!” Victor beamed his widest grin at him. “You’re here!”

Yuuri blinked. “Yes? Where else would I be?”

“He was very concerned about getting back to you,” Chris rolled his eyes and came to sit practically on top of Yuuri. “Everything was ‘Yuuri this’ and ‘Yuuri that’!”

“Er, what? Me?”

Victor flopped onto Yuuri’s other side, snuggling up to him and wrapping him in a drink-loose embrace while bestowing a sloppy kiss on his cheek. Makka, not wanting to be left out, flopped over all their laps and wiggled, happy to be part of the fun.

“I missed youuuu,” Victor slurred. “Why didn’t you come out with us?”

“Er, well this was your and Chris’s thing. I didn’t want to intrude.” Yuuri was getting slightly overheated, sandwiched between two large, sweaty men.

“But Yuuuuri,” Victor whined. “Nobody danced like you!”

The snort from Yuuri’s other side confirmed this estimation. “He wouldn’t shut up about dancing with you. You oughta give him a dance!”

“Oh!” Victor sat up and clapped his hands excitedly. “Yes, Yuuri dance with me!”

“What?” Yuuri squawked, “Here?”

The commotion had naturally woken Phichit from his doze, and he chimed in wickedly here. “Yea, Yuuri, give him a dance. Can’t you see he’s dying of thirst?”

“You shut up, Peach.” 

“Yuuuuuri!” Victor was clumsily rising to his feet and pulling at Yuuri’s arm. Reluctantly, Yuuri rose with him. 

“Put on some music, ma peche!” Chris laughed, and Phichit grinned wickedly and fiddled with his phone until the first heavy beats of NIN’s Closer came over the living-room speaker system.

“No!” Yuuri scolded. “Not that. Anything but that song.” There was no way Yuuri could dance with Victor to a song about fucking. Not tonight. 

Phichit laughed. “Well, how about something a bit more subtle, like Enrique! Everyone loves Enrique!”

The first warbling strains of Enrique singing “Tonight” filled the apartment, and Victor squealed and dragged Yuuri’s hips against him. Yuuri sighed and resigned himself to his fate. It was...marginally better. Though not much better when Victor began singing along to the chorus right into his face, breath sweetened with alcohol and gusting against Yuuri’s cheek. They ground together for endless beats while Yuuri did his best not to think about how it felt to have Victor’s leg between his and Victor’s hot sweaty skin under his hands. Chris and Phichit whooped and cheered them like lunatics.

Eventually a huge yawn cracked Victor’s jaw wide and Yuuri stepped back. “Come on Vitya, it’s time for bed.”

Victor burrowed into Yuuri’s neck and whined while Phichit snorted from behind them.

“Yea, it’s about time for bed for me too folks,” Phichit said. “Chris, you want the couch?”

Yuuri let Phichit take care of their friend and began drawing Victor along toward the bedrooms. 

“Yuuuri,” Victor began petulantly. “Will you at least kiss me goodnight?”

“What?” Yuuri spluttered. “No of course not!”

Victor’s eyes went wide with hurt. “Why not? Don’t you want to kiss me?”

Shock had Yuuri blurting out the truth without meaning to. “Of course I do, but not when you’re drunk.”

“Aw, Yuuri! I’m so glad, I want to kiss you too!” Victor’s eyes were so wide, and so blue. His lips were parted just so, and it would be so easy to just kiss him, right here in the hallway. 

“Come on, l-let’s get you into bed.”

“Sleep with me Yuuri, please!”

Yuuri sighed. “Alright. Come on.”

In Yuuri’s room, he carefully stripped a floppy Victor of his tight leather clubbing pants and tucked him up into the bed, sliding in behind him. Victor turned around and flung himself on Yuuri, tucking himself under Yuuri’s chin and wrapping his arms around Yuuri’s waist. Yuuri resigned himself to another embarrassing morning erection and tried not to enjoy the sleepy snuggles too much.

~  
Consciousness came over Yuuri slowly after his late night. Stretching, he rolled over to check if Victor was awake yet (and when had that become a routine?) only to find his friend laying flat on his back and staring at the ceiling. 

“Vitya?” Yuuri was surprised Victor was looking so awake, given how drunk he was the night before.

Victor spoke without looking at Yuuri, his tone strangely distant. “Did you mean it?”

“Eh?” Sleep slowed Yuuri’s brain, and confusion washed over him.

“Did you mean it when you said you wanted to kiss me?” Victor finally turned and looked at him.

Yuuri’s cheeks burned with a sudden flush. “Y-you remember that?”

“Yuuri,” Victor chided softly.

“A-ahm, I-uh” Yuuri stuttered, grasping for coherence. He wasn’t ready for this conversation, certainly not before his feet had even hit the floor in the morning. Closing his eyes, he took a breath and mumbled, “I’ve always meant it.”

“Why haven’t you, then?”

“I didn’t...think you would want me to. I mean, who wants their best friend to kiss them randomly.”

Gentle fingers caressed Yuuri’s face and he opened his eyes to look into the depthless blue of Victor’s. Victor’s voice was so, so soft when he spoke.

“I do.”


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which kissing happens!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright darlings, you’ve been waiting for it, and here it is! It’s time for the kissing to commence! I hope you enjoy the kissing and fluff after all the angst. Thanks as always are due to my lovely beta Bow_Woww, and to everyone who has commented. All your comments have been giving me life, thank you! 💕

Yuuri’s heart pounded in his ears as he looked up into Victor’s beautiful face. It couldn’t be this simple could it? Years of quiet loving could not just be brushed aside with a kiss, could they? If that was true, then their awkward experimentation as teenagers should have led to something, instead of the firm friendship and silent resolution not to talk about it. 

But now, Victor’s face was so close that Yuuri’s whole world was the blue of his eyes. The heat of Victor’s breaths washed against his lips and there was the faintest tremble in the hand holding his face. Victor was nervous too. Perhaps that’s what allowed Yuuri to close the final few centimeters and sink into the soft feel of Victor’s lips against his own. They slotted together like two puzzle pieces, perfectly fitted in a way that Yuuri had never quite felt before. The kiss was gentle, a slow exploration of lips and tongue that eventually tapered off into them forehead to forehead, breathing each other’s air with their eyes closed. 

“I-I’ve wanted this for so long,” Yuuri rasped into the quiet. “What’s changed? Why now?”

The long warmth of Victor shifted slightly and Yuuri opened his eyes to see Victor leaning back with a contemplative look on his face. “Nothing’s changed exactly. I just...I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a long time and you admitted last night that you wanted to kiss me so it seemed...like a good idea?”

“You’ve been wanting to kiss me?” Yuuri squeaked. “What? Since when?”

“Well, on and off for years! But you never seemed interested, so I let it go.”

“ _I’ve_ never seemed interested!”

“You’re so hard to read. I mean, you’ve always been affectionate, but you’re affectionate to Chris and Phichit too so,” Victor gave a little shrug, “I just figured it didn’t mean anything.”

Yuuri gurgled, words trapped in his throat and fighting over each other to escape. What finally emerged was, “I get erections sleeping with you!! I let you sleep in my bed!”

“Yes,” Victor grinned at him. “Those were clues that maybe my feelings were returned and maybe I might be good enough for you.” Victor’s face changed, brows drawing down a bit. “I-I was afraid...I still am. I mean after Kevin and...God I’m such a mess, especially compared to you. Why would you ever want to tie yourself to a loser like me?”

“Me?”

“Yea! I mean, look at you, only a year younger than me and you’re a respected professor and highly sought after choreographer in your own right, with your own place. Even Phichit! Three years younger and he’s a successful photographer who owns his own business! And he has a steady boyfriend!” Victor flopped on the bed dramatically. “Meanwhile, I’m a washed up old has-been with no boyfriend who works as a barista cause I couldn’t make it as a professional dancer.”

Yuuri scowled. “You are not a has-been. You have to know that Madame Lilia would cast you as the lead in her next production this minute if you wanted it, and you’re doing wonderfully as the lead in my production already.”

“Enh, says you.”

“Yes, says me. And it’s not like I have everything figured out. I may be doing ok professionally, but personally I’m a mess. I haven’t had a serious relationship since...ever really. And my last date was three months ago and she ‘wasn’t that into’ me. At least you’ve had good relationships, even great ones that ended positively and you stayed friends. Look at you and Chris! You dated what, ten years ago, and now he’s your best friend!”

Victor pouted slightly. “ _You’re_ my best friend, Yuuri.”

A flush took over Yuuri’s whole face. “Wh-what? I-”

“Yuuuuri of _course_ you’re my best friend! You’ve always been my best friend! You know I love you!”

 _As a friend, he loves you as a friend, get a grip Katsuki_. Yuuri did his best to calm his thumping heart and tame his blazing face, to little avail. “Ah! Um, y-you too of course. I mean, of course you’re my best friend too.”

A sly expression lurked behind Victor’s eyes. “You’re very red.”

“Shut uuuup. I’m fine.” Trust Victor to notice.

“Yuuuuri,” Victor crooned. “Do you have a crush on me?”

The only possible response was to flatten his face against Victor’s chest and mumble incoherently. Victor laughed and wrapped his arm back around Yuuri’s waist. A gentle touch to the top of his head almost felt like a kiss. 

After a while, Yuuri unburied himself and looked up into the smiling face of his best friend. “So. Kissing.”

“Yes.” Victor pursed his lips and looked down. “I-I don’t know where we go from here.”

“Well.” Yuuri took a deep breath. Here went nothing. “We already live together, you sleep in my bed five nights out of seven, if we add kissing to the mix then we might as well go ahead and call it what it is and say we’re dating.”

A look of dawning hope and delight stole across Victor’s face. “Really? You’d want to date me, even seeing what a mess I made of it with Kevin?”

“Ok, first, Kevin made it a mess, not you. None of that was your fault. Second, why wouldn’t I want to date you? You’re my best friend, you’re hot, and I like kissing you. Third, are you sure you’d want to date someone like me?”

Victor grinned mischievously. “‘You’re my best friend, you’re hot, and I like kissing you,’ like you said,” he quoted back at Yuuri.

“So.” Yuuri worried his lower lip. “Are we doing this then?”

Victor’s thumb pulled Yuuri’s lip free, and he leaned in, a soft look in his eyes. “Yes, let’s.” And then Victor’s lips were back on Yuuri’s. This kiss lasted longer, and went a bit deeper. There was a sense of connection as their tongues explored each other and their bodies pressed impossibly closer. Yuuri’s hand slid down to the small of Victor’s back, pulling him as close as possible. Victor, always having to go the extra mile, slid his hand down to grip Yuuri’s ass and grind forward a little. They broke apart panting, and Victor murmured, “Sealed with a kiss.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you as thirsty as I am, yes they totally do get it on after the end of this chapter. That’s a separate story which you can find linked from my [Twitter](https://twitter.com/liawolff/status/1199066443645702145?s=21).


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there are happy endings!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! This is the happy ending with all the fluff that you’ve been waiting for! I really appreciate everyone who has taken the time to read and comment, some of you commenting on other platforms as well. My readership is small, but I love every last one of you for reading my little angst-fest. 
> 
> Also, much love to Bow_Woww for betaing this whole thing and making it look pretty, as well as the folks from Discord who helped me when I was stuck for things like songs. You guys all rock!
> 
> I don’t know what I’ll be writing next, but no doubt something will come to me that I just HAVE to write sometime. If you liked this and want to see my other stuff, just subscribe to my profile. I’m an erratic poster I know, so the subscription is your best bet with that stuff.
> 
> Anyway, here is the last chapter. It’s a little bit like an epilogue as it jumps around in time a bit.

The first thing they did when they finally left Yuuri’s room was tell Phichit about their change in relationship. As their roommate, it would have been impossible to keep it from him anyway. Chris was after that, Victor shooting off a quick text to their friend. Chris’s reply contained entirely too many eggplant emojis, which was to be expected. Afterwards they settled in to a lazy Saturday at home, taking Makka for a walk to the park together and then settling on the couch with a light rom-com playing in the background. Phichit left them to it, saying he had plans. They snuggled down on the couch, Makka asleep at their feet, and traded kisses like secrets between them. There was no hurry, and no plan. Just the two of them, and a day for themselves. 

Victor gazed at Yuuri, ignoring the movie in the background, his eyes luminous with emotion. “You know, I really like you a lot. I-I even think I love you.”

Something warm and soft pulled at Yuuri’s chest. “I love you too. I always have, I just never wanted to admit to myself how much.”

“I can’t believe we’ve wasted all this time,” mourned Victor. “We...I could have avoided so much if I’d just been with you instead. How could I have been so stupid?”

“Hey,” Yuuri took Victor’s face gently in his hands and placed soft kisses on Victor’s eyelids. “You’re not stupid. We’re coming to this relationship at the right time for us.”

Life went on. At Yuuri’s suggestion, Victor found himself a therapist versed in domestic abuse. She was a nice, comfortably middle-aged woman with short purple hair and the sort of quiet motherly personality that reminded Yuuri of his okaa-san. After Victor had been going to see her for a couple months, and gotten comfortable with her, he started asking Yuuri to come to some of his sessions. Victor said it would help him to share with Yuuri his experiences and had the added benefit of helping to keep their relationship healthy too.

It broke Yuuri’s heart to listen at times to the ways in which Kevin had tried to break his beautiful Victor. But what really broke his heart was the realization that Victor needed the safe space of the therapist’s office to feel comfortable disagreeing or criticizing Yuuri. Realizing that Kevin had taken half a lifetime of trust and destroyed it in a few short years filled Yuuri with a mixture of sadness and rage that he didn’t quite know what to do with. Yuuri did his best to understand when Victor explained.

“It’s not that I don’t trust you babe. I know you’d never hurt me. But there’s a part of me that can’t quite believe that yet. This way I can get around that part and start rebuilding the trust.”

Yuuri listened with tears choking his throat and smiled his softest and most understanding smile. It hurt, but at the same time there was a surge of pride in his amazing boyfriend who wanted to rebuild that trust, and do it with him no less. Yuuri felt very unworthy at times of such an honor.

The physical side of their relationship moved slowly, mindful of the ways in which Kevin had hurt Victor. They worked up slowly to penetrative sex, and scheduled a therapy session for immediately after the first time Victor bottomed. Victor’s therapist praised their caution and helped them work through the feelings afterwards. 

Eventually Victor did take out a restraining order on Kevin after he showed up at their apartment again, and at the cafe twice more. Yuuri held his hand, literally, through the process of filing the report. Afterwards, Victor sighed a huge sigh of relief and hoped that was the end of it, finally. 

Yuuri’s show went off perfectly, each performance performed to a packed auditorium. Victor danced the lead perfectly, not so much ethereal as in the past but majestic. Yuuri watched every performance with his heart thumping in his chest at the beauty of his boyfriend’s movements, the way he lifted Catherine, the female lead, as if she weighed nothing. Pride in his students warred with pride in his boyfriend for ascendancy. Afterwards, Madame Baranovskaya approached Victor with an offer of a place in her troupe, which Victor gladly took after a small breakdown to Yuuri about not being worthy. Yuuri reassured him and urged him to take it. They continued to dance together in their evenings off, and Yuuri counted these some of the most precious moments of his week. And if sometimes Victor lifted Yuuri around the studio and the apartment as if he was the delicate ballerina he emphatically was not, well, then there was no one to tell on them except Phichit and Makka.

Somehow, with the round of life and everything moving forward at a breakneck pace, it was a year later and they were still together. Life had settled into a domestic round of dance and work and evenings spent cuddled together on the couch and mornings full of sweet kisses and coffee. Yuuri had never been so happy in his life, and he began to think thoughts of forever, and what if. The rings were a spur of the moment decision. He happened to be passing the jewelry store one afternoon and stopped on a whim. The two rings with their joined engraving of a pair of ballet shoes on the inside just seemed too perfect to pass up. He bought them and secreted them in his coat pocket, then scurried out of the shop as if he had been caught doing something scandalous. The rings weighed on his mind from then on, as he tried and failed repeatedly to work up the courage to actually propose. 

Victor noticed, of course, that something was off. He tried to get Yuuri to tell him what the problem was several times with no luck. Yuuri insisted nothing was wrong and did his best to hide his nerves from his boyfriend. The next weekend, Yuuri suggested a date to their favorite Spanish restaurant and Victor happily agreed. Yuuri’s hands were clammy all evening as they sat in the restaurant and chatted, though what they had discussed Yuuri never could have said afterwards. Victor didn’t seem to notice Yuuri’s abstraction, and Yuuri did his best to appear normal throughout. Once they were done eating, Yuuri suggested a walk around the nearby downtown area, a pretty place with sparkling lights for the oncoming Christmas season illuminating the mixture of older buildings and modern businesses surrounded by darkened parks. They wandered hand-in-hand, quietly enjoying each other’s company without further need for conversation. When they came to the steps of the historic old church at the corner of Main street, Yuuri realized it was time and pulled Victor to a stop. 

“Yuuri?” Victor looked confusedly at him. 

“Um.” Yuuri stuttered, his cheeks burning as he sought for a way to begin. “I love you.” That was a good start right?

Victor’s eyes went soft in the dim lights. “I love you too, Yuuri.”

“Yes, um, and we-we’ve been good together this last year. I-I know it’s only been a year, but, I, um I already know there’s no one else I’d rather be with.” Yuuri gulped and dipped his hand into his pocket and drew out the box containing the rings. “Y-you can say no if you think it’s too early, I’ll understand, but I bought these and I-I’ve been thinking about it, and there’s never been anyone else for me but you, Vitya. You are my best friend, and I want to spend the rest of my life loving you.” He opened the box and took out one of the rings, gleaming in the low lights.

“Yuuri!” Victor gasped, tears sparkling in his beautiful blue eyes. “Are…are you proposing?”

“Yes?”

Victor’s eyes spilled over with emotion and he threw his arms around Yuuri’s shoulders for a moment, before stepping back and saying in a shaky voice, “I don’t think it’s too early. There’s no one else I’d rather spend my life with than you. You-you’re my Prince Charming, and I accept!”

“Really?!” Yuuri faltered, shocked joy catching in his throat.

“Yes, really!” Victor was grinning widely now. “Now come on, put the ring on!”

Yuuri couldn’t help but return the smile, joy in every line of his face, as he slid the ring onto Victor’s finger. Victor took the other ring from the box, and slid it onto Yuuri’s hand in return. He used his grip on Yuuri’s hand to reel his fiance in and kiss him tenderly, just as a few snow-flakes began to drift down, peppering Yuuri’s dark hair with little white stars. Yuuri kissed Victor back with enthusiasm, and they were both grinning when they broke apart. 

“Yuuri,” Victor said, voice full of quiet reverence. He didn’t seem to have any other words to say, and Yuuri leaned in to kiss him once on the jaw before drawing out of the embrace and linking their hands together.

“Let’s go home, love.”

Victor beamed down at him. “Our home, forever!”

Yuuri smiled back, heart full of love. “Forever.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoy my writing, come say hi on [Pillowfort](%E2%80%9C) and follow me on [Twitter](%E2%80%9C) For updates on my writing and random chatter.


End file.
